Don't Make The Bridesmaids Hate You!

I've been a bridesmaid a lot and every single time the bride assures me that I will be able to "wear the dress again!"

Sure. And pigs will fly and the sun will shine at night!

One of my bridesmaid nightmares was a lemon yellow A-line long dress with a white lace yoke. Since my complexion is light olive, I looked greenish throughout the wedding. My aunt actually asked me if I was sick. Of course the bridesmaid who advised the bride on the dresses looked wonderful with her rosy cheeks and blue eyes, while the rest of us looked like we were going to puke!

And then there was the crinoline in polka dots that kept flopping up over my head, every time I sat down! It was very tiring to have to keep standing so my underwear wasn't on display!

But my all-time "favorite" bridesmaid dress was a pink ball gown dress. It had a full, round, layered chiffon over-skirt with a brown underskirt and poof sleeves. We also wore them with lime green floppy hats. I looked like a sick Hostess Sno-ball under a leaf.

Would you believe that they were made especially for us?

Ugly bridesmaid dresses recently inspired a movie - 27 Dresses!

Just once, I'd like to see a bridesmaid's dress that can be worn again!

Want to keep your bridesmaids as friends after the honeymoon? Don't make them hate you! Find a place in your vision to make sure that they like the dresses and shoes you are making them pay so much money to buy and wear. And for Pete's sake, pick out a dress they can wear more than once!

Plan a girls' night out and invite the bridesmaids to go shopping for the dresses with you. Make an appointment at a bridal salon. Inform them that you are seeking bridesmaids' dresses and that you want to have a selection ready in a certain price range. With bridesmaids in tow, have them look at the dresses.

Remember what looks good on a tall willowy blond won't necessarily flatter a short freckled redhead. Consider letting them choose their own gowns, maybe in different hues of the same color that go with their complexions or with a universally flattering hemline but different dress styles to suit their bodies - some women like sleeveless, others hate their upper arms and want them covered. Take their concerns into account and find the dresses that will stand the test of time - and your friendship.

Do not make your final selection at this time. Take digital photos of each woman in each style dress. Record style number, designer or company and other pertinent information. Go home and sleep on the choices.

After the dress excursion, go out to dinner and talk about everything that made you friends in the first place. Have a good time - and don't talk about the dresses! After a couple of days, call each of your bridesmaids and ask her for choice of dress. If you have bridesmaids from out town, send them copies of the pictures and get their input into the dress style. Once you have all the data, tally the votes.

Then you can make your decision. If all the women are happy, then they will joyfully walk down the aisle before you and make your day even better !