Make Her Say YES! Ask Your Bridesmaids with Style

We've spent a lot of time talking about the wedding party ... who to ask, who not to ask and what they should wear. All important topics, I must say.

But let's back up just a tad and think about how you can ask them.

Although many girls would take out their youngest cousin's 12-year-old daughter to be a bridesmaid, it is a tough job. If you have been a bridesmaid - you know that.

Bridesmaid 101 lists almost two dozen job responsibilities and ClassyWeddingFavors.Com says bridesmaids should expect to dish out up to $200 for the shower alone. Eek.

For this reason, I suggest brides pamper their maids every chance they get ... starting with Day One.

Instead of picking up the phone or swinging by your friend's house after work, consider throwing a cocktail party, girls' night or lunch date and invite all of your potential bridesmaids to join your wedding party at one time.

American Greetings has a wide selection of e-vites to set the tone. Choose a theme, either wedding-related or something that relates to all of your friends. For example, if you and your potential attendants love reading books and hanging out at Starbucks, choose a cafe-related e-vite and ask them to meet you at your favorite coffee house for lattes.

Here are a few other party themes that could help you pop the question.

- Martini Madness
Choose an e-vite decorated with martini glasses and use colors such as dark green, maroon and brown. Invite your potential bridesmaids over for a night of Sex in the City reruns and cosmos. Make a toast for them proclaiming how much they mean to you and ask them to be in your wedding party.

- Mexican Fiesta
Send a Mexican-flavored e-vite and ask your friends to join you for lunch at your favorite Mexican restaurant. Hand write a note for each girl and ask the waiter to deliver it, along with her favorite dessert (that you have pre-ordered) at the end of the meal. Who could say no to that?

- Girls Gone Goofy
Invite your potential attendants to a pre-bachelorette party bash by choosing a girls' night-themed e-vite. Ask them to meet at your house for dinner or appetizers before you hit the town. When they have all arrived, let them know how much their friendship has meant to you and tell them that there is no one you'd rather stand by your side when you say "I do," than them. Celebrate by going out dancing, to a karaoke bar or to your favorite pub.

Since you know how much work is involved and how expensive things could get for your bridesmaids, be sure to tell them they don't have to answer you right away. I suggest for you to insist they think about it for a few days before giving you an answer. You don't want one of your potential bridesmaids to get caught up in the moment and say "yes," only to tell you a few weeks later that she can't afford it.

Pamper your bridesmaids from the start and they are sure to repay the favor every chance they get.

Have you already asked your bridesmaids to be in your wedding party? Did you do something special for them? If so, what did you do?

Photos courtesy of Saquan Stimpson and Adam