Four Wedding Expenses You Might Not be Expecting

I know you ... you are a budget-wise bride. Right? You have set your budget, you’ve done your homework. And you know what to expect when it comes to your expenses.

Or do you?

Here are four of the most common expenses many couples overlook when setting their wedding budgets.


1. Postage
Currently running over 40 cents a head, postage stamps are one of the first things many couples forget to include when setting their budget. To manage your costs, it is important to ask your stationary supplier for a weight estimate before committing to an invitation and specifically ask how many stamps you will need. You could also consider creating your own wedding invitations online, trimming your guest list or forgoing pre-stamped RSVP cards (and consider online RSVPs instead).

2. Corking / Cake-Cutting Fees
I think both the corking and cake-cutting fees-a $2.00-$5.00 per guest fee added to your bill by overzealous caterers and directors in an attempt to suck every last penny from your purse-is well, crap.

It is!

Where else in the world will you drop thousands of dollars on food and wine and then be charged extra for them to slice it up? Many caterers claim the fee is charged on drinks or cakes purchased from an outside vendor, but I’ve seen more than my share of caterers who try to sneak in this fee on wine or cakes you bought from them.

Talk to your caterers BEFORE you sign a contract and negotiate any corking and cake-cutting fees out of your contract. If they really want your business-and believe me, they do-they’ll be happy to give you a break on these fees.


3. Alterations
Although oftentimes you can limit your dress alteration needs by purchasing the appropriate dress length, choosing your shoes wisely or selecting a corset-back dress (that can accommodate a three dress-size difference), you still might find you need a nip here or a tuck there to make that dress fit like a glove. If so, these costs can add up-especially if you secure a seamstress through your bridal boutique.

Additionally, most bridal gowns don’t come with a bussell, so unless you want to spend the night dragging your dress off of the floor-you don’t, by the way-then, you will have to cough up the cash for this alteration, as well. Ask other brides in your area for recommendations and take your business outside of the boutique. I saved close to $300 this way.

4. Vendor OT
Nowhere else is it as important to 1) create a wedding day schedule and 2) read the fine print, as it is with your vendors-especially your photographer, videographer, transportation and band/DJ. Why? Because time is money, my friend.

When you book your vendors, you are purchasing their time and experience for a set number of hours. If you go over, you will pay the price. Oftentimes starting at $250 per hour for photographers and videographers, $150 per hour for transportation and $100 per hour for band/DJ, even running over half an hour could bust your budget.

Think I’ve covered it all? Well, I haven’t. Be sure to come back next week for four more big expenses many couples forget to budget.

Photos courtesy of Mirnanda and spudballoo

Hot Honeymoon Destinations

For many brides, that first married-couple vacation can almost feel like an afterthought. And who can blame them? Since the day they said “yes,” they’ve been busy meeting with caterers, pouring over menu and wine selections and picking their wedding day buds-and unless their future “Mr’s” are helpful wedding or vacation planners, most of the burden may have fallen to the bride.

But don’t let it get you down and don’t forget to give your honeymoon the proper planning it deserves.

This Big Trip is the only honeymoon you and your sweetie will ever take, so even if you can’t afford that month-long African Safari you’ve always dreamed of, make your honeymoon trip a good one.

Need some inspiration? Here are five sizzling honeymoon destinations that are guaranteed to get your marriage off on the right foot.


1. Most Popular Overall

Hawaii
For years, these Pacific islands have taken first place in the honeymoon destination department for love and romance. And why shouldn’t they? With over 4,000 square miles of beaches, mountains, volcanoes and waterfalls, the Big Island in Hawaii is one of the few places on earth that offers something for everyone.

2. Most Popular Domestic

Las Vegas
If what happens in Vegas really does stay in Vegas, then why not join the hordes of other newlyweds who chose Sin City for their Honeymoon and make some sultry secrets of your own? Think about it-big city, bright lights, gambling, live shows and buffets … and really, nothing says "I love you" like the glitz and glimmer of the Las Vegas Strip.

3. Most Popular Caribbean

Puerto Rico
Looking for something a bit more exotic than Vegas, but closer to home than Hawaii? Then you, like thousands of other couples, should head down south to the white sandy shores of Puerto Rico.

Popular for honeymooners because of the dramatic cliffs and swooping coastlines, Puerto Rico's casinos, mild climate, natural attractions and vicinity to the US make it an affordable tropical honeymoon destination.


4. Most Popular European

Italy
No place on earth rivals the bel paese when it comes to love, history, art and romance and with 44 UNESCO World Heritage Sites to its name-more than any other country in the world!-an Italian honeymoon guarantees to keep you busy.

The Big Three-Rome, Florence, Venice-continue to be popular with honeymooners, as does the Amalfi Coast, Siena and southern Italy.

5. Something Different

Alaskan Cruise
So what do you do if you and sweetie are none too thrilled with the idea of 10 days of beaches, sand and sunburns? Then cruise up north for a once-in-a-lifetime tour of the Alaskan wilderness. Cruise from one wild Alaskan point to another while watching the whales, ayak, hike or dog sled on your shore excursions or hop on a copter for an aerial view of the largest US state.

Chattanooga, Tennessee, Dry Tortugas, Florida, San Antonio, Texas, Montrose, Colorado and Intercourse, Pennsylvania are other interesting domestic destinations.

For a unique international honeymoon destination, consider Argentina, Belize, Turkey, Thailand, India or Morocco.

Have you selected your honeymoon destination yet? Where are you going?

Photos courtesy of Jeff Kubina and Paolo Margari

Keeping the "WE" in Weddings: How to Deal With Four of the Biggest Pre-Wedding Arguments

Congratulations! You are engaged. You’ve met the man of your dreams and can spend the rest of your life in marital bliss … right?

Well, yes. And no.

As I’m sure your mother has told you, marriages take work. You have to listen, be compassionate and (gasp!) compromise. The same goes with your wedding.

It is possible you and your fiancé will be the one couple in 100,000,000 that doesn’t argue during the wedding planning process and if you are yet to tear into it over table linens or font choices, then kudos to you!

The Knot lists 10 of the biggest pre-wedding fights and gets insight from psychotherapist, Tina B. Tessina on how to avoid them. I’m going to choose four my favorites, summarize Tessina’s advice and add my own notes in parentheses.

1. Familial Issues
One of the main arguments newly engaged couples have is over his-or her-family, their ever-growing guest list and how much money they’re adding to the pile. Tessina believes this type of argument is “a prototype for future financial dealings” and suggests for couples to approach the issue as if it were a business dealing. (Smart woman, this Tina Tessina. However, this assumes you are “splitting” the guest list in threes (her family, his family, and the two of you ... and if you are, that’s awfully nice of you. But remember, it *is* your wedding and you and your fiancé have precedence. If you guys aren’t on the same page-get there, quickly and start practicing supporting each other through difficult decisions.)

2. Getting the Groom Going
I know, I know … your groom doesn’t give a rat’s rooter what color the tablecloths are or if you choose lilies or roses. I get it. Tessina advises brides to realize that men don’t normally care about things such as design and décor, and sadly, their wedding is no different. She suggests to find something they are interested in and try to get them involved in that. (IF you can. Most brides I know have tried this technique to no avail. My advice is to get over it. You know you wouldn’t be happy if he chose the invitations from the bottom of your list, anyway, so be glad you can do all of the planning and get him to help verify non-RSVPers or confirm vendors just before the Big Day.)

3. Busting Bridezilla
We’ve all known women who somehow take on a monstrous facade when they planned their wedding. They were horrible to deal with, had unrealistic expectations and were basically all-out witches. Witches. I said witches. Tessina says if you see yourself in this scenario, then “drop the Martha act.” (I say, if your fiancé thinks you are getting out of control, take a step back and reevaluate your priorities. Remember, your wedding is a special day-but it is just one day. You don’t want to cause conflicts that could leave a mark on your new marriage.)

4. Old Flames
So what would you do if your fiance wants to invite his ex to the wedding? Tessina tells brides to “grow up” already, because he already chose you and suggests for brides to reach out to the friend and try to get to know her. (I, personally, couldn’t disagree more. I don’t understand why either of you would insist on any guest being present that could potentially upset your wedding day. This isn’t a dinner party he wants to invite her to, it is your wedding and unless you and your fiance are both 100% ok with inviting exes, then save that invite for your great-great-grandmother. Or your dog groomer.)

What other pre-wedding fights do you think engaged couples encounter? Do you agree with Tessina’s assessments? Do you agree with mine? Please share your opinions!

Three Tips to Setting the (Right) Wedding Date

It is one of the most important decisions you’ll make as a newly engaged couple, yet many couples jump the gun and make a decision-without giving it proper thought.

I’m talking about the date.

The wedding date, that is.

Not only will this date live on year after year-whether he remembers it or not-but it is important because the date you choose could have a huge impact on your guest count, wedding theme and vendor availability.

Here are three tips to ensuring you set the right wedding date.

1. Find the biggest red-letter day calendar you can find and mark an “X” on the AVOID dates.

In general, dates to avoid include

- Daylight savings days (so your guests won’t accidentally miss your nuptials!)

- Thanksgiving Day

- Christmas Eve and Christmas Day

- Super Bowl Weekend

- Easter Sunday

2. On the same calendar, circle any POTENTIALLY AVOID dates.

Some dates you should potentially avoid include long weekends when your guests might have other things to do. For example, having your wedding the weekend of President’s Day isn’t a big deal, as most guests don’t honor this weekend with out of town BBQs or trips to the lake. However, they might for the weekends of Labor Day and Memorial Day. Keep the following observances in mind when you plan your Big Day ...

- Memorial Day Weekend (Explained above)

- Labor Day Weekend (Same for Memorial Day)

- Independence Day (Same for Memorial Day and Labor Day Weekends … people might be out of town or on family vacations.)

- Mother’s Day (Some families plan big feasts for their mamas each year and might not want to / or feel pressured not to miss the occasion.)

- Father’s Day (Same goes for dear ‘ole dad's day.)

- New Year’s Eve (It could be a great party, but keep in mind that many people might be out of town or prefer to celebrate on their own. This is especially true if you aren’t having a big party with drinking and dancing.)

- Halloween (Unless you plan to have a costume party and/or Halloween-themed wedding, rethink this date.)

- April Fools’ Day (Unless you are into funky celebrations ... then go for it!)

- Your Birthdays (It might seem cute to get married on your groom’s birthday, but consider that forever forward, he’ll have to share his birthday with your wedding anniversary. You’ll have to buy two gifts for the same day and he’ll essentially be losing a date of celebration.

- Other Dates that are important to you, your groom, your families or your closest friends. For example, you might not want to get married on the day your soon-to-be husband’s mother passed away. It is poor taste ... you know what I'm saying?

3. Carry that calendar with you when you meet various venues or caterers that could make or break your preferred wedding date.

It is possibly-likely even, that you will go through this process and choose a date, only to have your number one caterer of choice tell you he’s booked. That is ok. If you have made notes on your calendar and at least tried to think of any potential date conflicts-and noted them!-then you can easily adjust your wedding date to suit your favorite vendors.

Also keep in mind that non-popular wedding months (like January or November) might be less expensive, as well as getting married on a Thursday, Friday or Sunday. As always, keep in mind that out-of-town guests might have a hard time arriving for your 6:00 PM Thursday evening wedding-especially if they plan to drive.

What other dates do you think couples should choose and/or avoid?

Five Wedding Day Details You Won’t Want To Miss

It is almost here-the day you’ve been planning for months and months and the event you may have been dreaming of for years and years … Your Wedding Day.

You’ve made your list and checked it twice-or thrice, and are confident no detail has been missed.

Aren’t you?

Well, just in case, here are five wedding day details you won’t want to forget!

1. Directions
The Google generation knows how to fire up their laptops and find the quickest route to almost any point on the globe … but your great grandma might not. Don’t forget to include directions either with your invitation or on your wedding website and follow up with people who might not have easy access to a GPS.

2. Kiddos
Cater to your smallest guests in a way that makes them feel special and search out new, fun ideas to get them involved. When I got married, I asked my children-bearing guests if their kiddos would rather sit at a children’s only table or sit with their parents. Many of them chose the kids’ tables. I had food stations for the adults and asked the caterers to serve the children a special kids-only platter. I also made an activity book, presented it with a napkin-full of colored pencils and served them an imported chocolate surprised-filled egg from Italy. It was a hit!


3. Welcome Baskets
I love welcome baskets and for the record, I’ve never met an out-of-town guest who didn’t eat them up. Literally. The cost doesn’t have to be extravagant. Just buy a basket or wedding theme-colored shopping bag and fill it with local flavor. For my wedding in Texas, I served up spicy Tex-Mex salsa and a bag of chips, miniature pecan pies, jars of honey (that was made at my aunt’s ranch) and TexJoy seasoning (that is made in my hometown).

I added items depending on the guests’ tastes, such as a 6-pack of assorted imported beer for my beer-drinking travel buddies and American-flavored drinks and desserts, such as Dr. Pepper and Oreo cookies for our Italian guests.

Don’t forget to include a welcome note, a map of the city, brochures from area attractions, a list of recommended restaurants or cafes and a wedding weekend itinerary.

4. Restroom Baskets
Speaking of baskets, why not create two more and ask your venue coordinator to place them in the restrooms. Using your same stationary design-so your guests will recognize them from your wedding- create a sign and let your guests know you’ve really thought everything. I included toothpics, mouthwash, spray deodorant, hair spray, safety pins, tampons and a sewing kit in my restroom baskets.

5. Menu Cards
Although it is easily something you can save your money on, menu cards add a touch of class and show your guests the lengths you’ve taken with your details. Using the same stationary design and colors as your escort cards and programs, create a small sign outlining your menu. If you are having a sit down dinner, your guests will read it and anticipate each course and if you are having food stations, it will direct them to food they might not have otherwise found.

What special touches are you including with your wedding?

Photo courtesy of digitialsean

Six Wedding Trends for 2009

Oh yes … we are six months in 2009 and some brides are already planning weddings for well into 2010 or even 2011. But if you are one of the Jeanie-come-lately brides-to-be, then don’t fret. There is still time for you to jump into the trends and have a wedding that looks like you’ve been planning it for months and months.

Here are six of the biggest wedding trends for 2009.1. Outdoor Weddings
For 2009, chic brides are headin’ outdoors and putting a stylish spin on an old-fashioned backyard wedding. If you’re wondering if a backyard wedding is right for you, then you are in luck … we’ve already discussed it.

To keep with current trends, be sure to include vintage centerpieces and vases, fresh garden-style flowers and plenty of outside lighting. Wood signs are big this year and brides are showing up in casual dresses and wearing their hair in long flowing layers.


2. Two-Tiered Cakes
According to TheKnot dot Com, cupcakes and dessert bars are soooo 2008. Trendy brides in 2009 are bringing back the cake, but leaving out the layers. Experts say two layers are tops and even suggest using one-layered cakes as table centerpieces. (This is an idea I *love*, as I almost went with this idea for my 2007 wedding.)


3. Rewearable Bridesmaid Dresses
The cookie-cutter bridesmaid look has-thankfully!-been fading over the last few years, but 2009 brides know that the key to your bridesmaid’s hearts-and wallets-is to choose something they actually can wear again. I was in a wedding last weekend where the blushing bride asked us to choose a knee-length black dress that we liked. We could use something from our own collection-if we had it, or buy a new dress that we’d want to wear again. To keep things fun, she wore bright red heels and asked each of us to choose another bright colored sandal of our choice.


4. Vintage
I said it before with the backyard wedding trend, but vintage is everywhere in 2009. Look for brides to choose something from their mothers’ or grandmothers’ jewelry box to add to her bouquet, to choose a birdcage veil or even to add a few 1920s inspired feathers to flowers or centerpieces.


5. Bright Colors
Have your heart set on being pretty in pink? No problem. Just kick it up a notch-or four. Pastel colors and muted tones are falling to the wayside in lieu of bright jewel tone shades and bold colors. Remember those colors we talked about a few months ago? They are still big. So choose a few bright shades of pink, orange or turquoise and get ready to strut your stuff with bold colors.


6. Food Stations and Signature Drinks
Sit-down dinners are the epitome of class at any wedding reception, but in 2009, brides are infusing their receptions with a bit of funky flavor and style. Food stations are growing in popularity, as are signature drink stations. When I got married, I had an Italian Bellini drink station, complete with hand-dipped white-chocolate tips and strawberries. It was the hit of party!

What special touches are you adding to your wedding this year?

Photos courtesy of shutupyourface, chaserpaul, erin m, pearlbamboo, smcgee and specialkrb

Three Honeymoon Packing Lists for Any Destination

Image by Chris Gin via Flickr

As if planning your wedding, counting your pennies and organizing your newly married life together wasn’t enough fun, now you get to travel. I’m talking, overly-flustered bride-to-be, about your honeymoon.

So … where are you going?

Did you decide on a new domestic destination you haven’t yet visited? Are you going on a week-long cruise? Maybe you are heading overseas? Well, whatever you have decided, this trip is one of the most important trips of your lifetime. No matter how often you and your sweetie have traveled together-you’ve never taken a honeymoon and no matter what other destinations you visit in your lifetime-you’ll never get this trip back.

Over-packing is one of the biggest mistakes honeymooners make when traveling and although I’m sure you really *do* need those eight pair of sandals, lugging heavy suitcases around the airport, train stations and ports isn’t much fun.

So, here are three honeymoon packing lists you can use for almost any destination. Add them to the general packing list below and soon you’ll be sipping Mai Tai’s in style … if that’s your thing, of course.

General List

Carry-on Bag:

-In a folder, keep all of your airline ticket confirmations, passport, visa and driver’s license copies and hotel and transfer receipts and contact information. Put this in the front of your carry-on for easy access.
- Small wallet with credit cards and cash (Divide your cards and cash so each of you have equal amounts in case someone loses their half!)
- Credit card company phone numbers
- Prescription medicine
- Book or magazine for long trips
- Camera with extra battery or memory stick
- Sunglasses
- Guidebook and/or destination notes

Pack:

For both of you
- 3-4 shirts that you can either layer and/or mix and match with your pants
- 2-3 pairs of pants or shorts (or skirts, for her)
- 1 light sweater
- 1 hat (weather-appropriate)
- 1 pair comfortable walking shoes
- 3-4 pairs of socks and underwear
- 1 umbrella or 2 ponchos
- 2-3 scarves that you can mix and match with your clothes (for her)

Toiletries
- Toothpaste
- Toothbrushes
- Deodorant
- Cosmetics/Make-up remover (for her)
- Comb/brush
- Hairspray
- Shaving cream
- Razors
- Contact Lenses and solution

Beach Honeymoon Packing List

For her
- 1 sundress
- 1 pair of shoes to match
- 1 swimsuit
- 1 swimsuit cover-up or sarong
- 1 pair of sandals to wear to the beach

For him
- 1 swimsuit
- 1-2 extra t-shirts to wear at the beach
- 1 pair of shoes to wear to the beach

For both of you
- Aloe vera
- Sun block
- Lip balm

*Leave beach towels at home. Most beach resorts provide them or you can buy them onsite and have a good souvenir of your honeymoon vacation.

City Honeymoon Packing List

For both of you
- 1 nice coat you can layer with other clothes or dress up for a night out
- 1 dressier set of clothes
- 1 nice pair of shoes to match

Cold Weather Honeymoon Packing List

For both of you
- 1 pair of gloves
- 1-2 cold-weather hats
- 3-4 cold-weather scarves
- 1 heavy jacket
- 1 pair of boots
- Facial moisturizer